Working with residential clients can be tricky. You get to be architect, friend, and therapist—whether you had planned to or not. Throw in the occasional bickering (because yes, it’s stressful), indecision about even the best of plans, and lots of handholding, and you can find yourself in for more than you expected.

However, in the 17 years of being self-employed—and no matter the complexity of the project or the client—my clients have respected my time out of the office. If I’m on vacation, then they can wait until I return to answer any questions. One even texted me, then chastised me for responding when she found out I was waiting to board a plane. “DO NOT ANSWER YOUR TEXTS!” Clearly someone thought I needed some time off.

Even my business partners at my first firm and contractors then and now would let me go and unplug for a week. Although to be fair, this year I did have a contractor reach out via text “respectfully” asking for some answers to an estimating email. But he was at least willing to acknowledge that he knew I was out of town, and I didn’t want to be bothered, so I didn’t feel too put out to respond.

However, in all the time I’ve taken vacation, I’ve never given much thought to my out-of-office response. People knew I was out. What more was there to say? “I’m out from this date to this date. If you need me, text and I’ll try and get back to you as soon as I can.” Pretty basic really, and I thought more than enough. Then last week I received the following out-of-office response from a colleague:

I will be out of the office from Thursday, September 11th through Monday, September 15th, and will return on Tuesday, September 16th.

During this time, I’ll be practicing the fine art of not checking emails, and as you know me well, this is quite the Olympic-level challenge! My laptop will be safely tucked away, my phone notifications turned off, and my “urgent email radar” temporarily deactivated.

As my wonderful clients are already aware, we operate in the delightfully predictable world where true emergencies are about as rare as finding a parking spot right in front of your destination. Everything that feels urgent today will still be manageable when I return, and probably with better perspective after a few days of rest.

I’ll respond to all messages promptly upon my return on September 17th. Thank you for your patience, and I look forward to reconnecting with you next week, refreshed and ready to tackle whatever interesting challenges await us.

For anything that truly cannot wait until September 16th: Please take a deep breath, make yourself a nice cup of coffee, and remember that it probably can wait after all.

Thanks for understanding!

Clearly, I’ve been doing my out-of-office all wrong. And while his partner commented that the response was too much, I am hard-pressed to find anything wrong with it. Especially regarding emergencies. Nothing was ever so critical on a project that the client wasn’t okay waiting until I returned to the office.

However, I am going to need to put more thought into what I’m sending out while I’m away. And instead of something generic, perhaps tailoring them to the location.

Thanks for reaching out to Spotted Dog Architecture! I am currently in New Orleans for vacation and probably in a bar somewhere along Bourbon Street. I cannot guarantee my ability to respond to any emergencies—real or perceived—in a timely or coherent manner. However, you are welcome to text me, and I will respond after my first mimosa.

Granted, one of my partners wasn’t deterred one year, calling around 10:30 one morning looking for a phone number. But she knew. “You’re probably in a bar already, but I need so-and-so’s number.” First, yes. I was in a bar. It’s vacation, and you can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning. Second, I knew it by heart, so the call lasted all of three minutes. And I was able to go back to my holiday.

But New Orleans has come and gone this year, so I’ll have to wait until December when we head off to Key West. Not 100% sure what I’ll say, but I know who to reach out to for help when the time comes. Because it’s clearly not just about being out of the office, but making sure everyone knows just how out you are.