I should just make that my moniker during the summer. Clearly, I am doomed to suffer every year around this time. I should just throw in the towel and become one with the misery. From June to September, I can simply address myself as Sweaty McSweatypants. It would leave very little to the imagination as to how my days are going.
I know more than once I’ve written about the dog days of summer in Texas. Oddly, our dogs are the ones who don’t seem to mind as much. Even the squirrels have started splooting. But Snickers and Lucy keep wanting to go out and lay in the yard at the peak of hot, like they’re working on their tan. Maybe we’re keeping the house too cold for their liking?
I, however, am no fool. I am more than happy to stay indoors and enjoy the air conditioning. When you look out the window and it just looks hot, the temptation to wander around outside goes right out the window. If I must open the door to let them in and out, I am happy to oblige. Just as long as they don’t expect me to come outside too.
Amazingly, this season has been temperate – if not reaching 100 degrees every day can be considered temperate. We’ve even had rain in July. And we have certainly had worse at both ends of the spectrum. But not reaching multiple days of 100+ weather does feel like a little bit of a reprieve. Of course, I realize as I type this just how nutty that sounds, especially when you run around saying how thankful you are that it’s “only” 97.
Except I wasn’t thankful this morning while I was measuring. Indoors. With no air conditioning. And only two doors open. While I was smart to go first thing (because it was only in the low 80s), trying to write down dimensions while sweat runs in places you didn’t know existed wasn’t as much fun as you might think.
Perhaps the time has come to find a summer intern or two who can brave the heat while I stay happily ensconced at 70 degrees. I wonder what the going rate would be for making them endure the lousier weather? Or do I just try and pass it off as a “learning experience” they can add to their resume? Not sure how future interviews would go.
“What did you do while you were interning for Sweaty McSweatypants?”
“Sweat. Just sweat. And a lot of it.”
But it wouldn’t be like I had them stand there fanning me while I measure. Although on second thought…
