Networking with architects should be a spectator sport.

I had this realization a few weeks ago at the Texas Society of Architects’ annual conference. The LGBTQIA+ Alliance had a happy hour at one of the few remaining lesbian bars in the country. Nothing unusual there, except our event happened to overlap with the monthly happy hour held by the Greater Houston LGBTQ+ Chamber of Commerce.

“Uh oh. There are other people in the same room. And they aren’t architects. Now what do we do?”

You mean in the bar full of queer business owners? People who could one day be clients? People who may have never met an architect? You talk to them. Or at least that’s how networking is supposed to work. I just wish it had.

I also found myself wishing I had some popcorn to go with my cocktail and a good vantage point to watch the evening unfold. Instead, I did my best to get the architects to talk to the other people in the room. I tried to encourage the chamber members to say hi, even pulling a few of them over to our side of the room. One Houston architect even commented: Leave it to the architect from Dallas to introduce the Houston architects to Houston business owners.

Well, someone had to.

But I get it. Architects are generally uncomfortable with networking, especially when it involves non-architects. We don’t have that training in school or the office, and unless our employers encourage us, we’re not likely to become involved in outside organizations where we can learn to do that. I’ve even had an architect comment that he’d rather shirk away in the darkness and sketch.

I admit, I was terrified at the first networking event I attended. “This corner here? Looks great! I’ll stand here and hope no one comes over to talk to me.” And I nailed it! But the next was better. And the next, and the next. Lots of practice talking to people who weren’t architects.

I wonder if the AIA could get Jane Goodall to give up chimps and start studying architects instead. I’m sure there’s something she learned in all those years in the Tanzanian forests that could translate to architects. We are social in many ways. We must be if we’re going to talk to clients. We just seem to have a hard time going outside of our bubble.

Which is why I was delighted to know that the Houston LGBTQ+ Chamber members were going to be at Pearl Bar. This great opportunity for my tribe to interact with new people just fell into our laps. We get to meet new people and gain more networking experience under our belt.

Except that will have to wait until next year when the conference is in Dallas. But I have a year to plan which groups to toss into the mix at our happy hour, and how to get them to talk to one another. Where there’s a will, I’m sure I can figure something out.

Although the easier option might be just grabbing some popcorn and drinks and seeing who wants to join me for the latest spectator sport.